Dear Person

Dear Person feeling Disappointed,

I understand the disappointment and the desire for more. I know that it can feel like life is standing in the way of everything you want—whether it’s a disability, family challenges, or other obstacles. It can all feel overwhelming, can't it? I truly understand. Let me be vulnerable with you for a moment.

Here is a post I made in high school on Facebook:

"Honestly, as I reflect on my life in high school, this is not how I expected it! I found a letter I wrote to myself and it said I hoped I'd be a football star, jazz band player, soloist in choir more and more, student council president, track star, basketball player, queen of one of the courts, and many other things!! And as I look at my years of high school, how many of these things did I accomplish, ZERO!!! I can barely even handle a full day at school. I have to go home after third so I can handle my medical issues. I can't take actual classes because it's too much for me. I miss band and choir events because I have so many medical problems! Heck, I only made it to ONE marching band thing! It's killing me! It really does. I have one more chance to make ONE of these things, but I don't think it's going to happen.. I really don't.

Being a burn survivor can be hard sometimes. You deal with the issues for years after the burn! Here I am almost 14 years after the initial burn, still fighting the scars, still having surgeries, still getting infections, still having open wounds!! I really hate it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm proud of myself for surviving what could have killed me. BUT it is hard. I am proud of where I am, that I've grown so much, but I'm still hating it. I miss everything I used to do, my friendships I lost these past years, the days without curling up in a ball from pain, everything."

I may not have made it to varsity sports or honors. I may have been an outcast for most of my time. But you know what? That doesn’t define who I became, and it won’t define who you are either. While I didn't thrive in high school, I found my strength in college and beyond. That’s where it all changed for me. And you know what? It can be the same for you. Just because this season is tough doesn’t mean your future is doomed.

You have the power to decide how disappointment will shape you. Even today I'll fight the thoughts of not being accepted in the group or if people truly want me. I fight to see the world for a good place at times and connect deeper because I am afraid of pain from others or that another problem will hold me back. It's taken years to step out into my callings because I was in a mindset of negativity that every time a good thing came, I was actually in a bad place and everything will drop. But that is not the truth. It isn't for me and it doesn't need to be for you either!

Will you continue to hold onto the hurt and feel bad about where you are? Or will you take charge and make a change, no matter how small, toward something better?

The journey ahead might not be easy, but remember—your past doesn’t dictate your future. Keep moving forward, one step at a time, and know that brighter days are waiting for you. You’ve already shown strength just by getting this far. Don’t stop now.

With belief in you,

Kelsay